Funny Bonus Points Comic Funny Bonus Points

View one - 10 results for bonus comic strips. Find the best "Bonus" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business organization ethics, #wealth, #ceo, #good task, #50 million dollar bonus, #not motivated, #bad genes, #inequality, #dosaprity, #ceo and worker, #unfair wages, #crazy coin, #slave wages, #more work, #no rewards, #money

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Carol: What does our CEO get if he does a adept job? Boss: A fifty million dollar bonus. Ballad: What do I get if I do a expert task? Boss: More piece of work. Carol: What'south your best guess nearly why I'm non motivated? Boss: Bad genes.

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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, altogether, engineer, time sail, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, projection management, topper, leader, boss, modify, coming together, data, management, mordac

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #functioning this yr, #tasks, #tiny raise, #boss asigned, #bonus, #keeping salaries depression, #workplace violence

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The Boss sits at his desk and Dilbert sits across from him. The Boss tells Dilbert, "Your performance this year was good, but you lot worked on tasks that aren't important. Therefore you get a tiny raise." Dilbert looks angry every bit he replies, "I worked on the tasks YOU assigned. What's that say about YOUR performance?" The Boss replies, "Information technology's excellent. I get a bonus for keeping salaries low." Dilbert asks, "Accept you seen any literature on workplace violence?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #write bug gratuitous software, #ten dollar bonus, #observe and play a joke on, #right behavior, #new minivan, #afternoon

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The Boss, Dilbert, Wally and Alice sit at a conference table. The Dominate says, "Our goal is to write issues-costless software. I'll pay a 10-dollar bonus for every issues yous find and fix." Dilbert, Wally and Alice throw their artillery upward in excitement. Dilbert yells, "Yahoo!" Alice yells, "We're rich!" Wally yells, "Aye!!! Yeah!!! Yes!!!" The Boss says, "I hope this drives the right behavior." Wally says, "I'k gonna write me a new minivan this afternoon!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #promise the customer, #build in month, #timing probelm, #shifting arraign, #technology, #spending huge bonus, #blame transfer

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Dilbert sits at a conference table with several people. A salesman tells them, "I had to promise the customer nosotros could build the thing in a calendar month even though you said information technology was incommunicable." The salesperson continues, "I'll solve the timing problem by shifting blame to engineering while spending the huge bonus I got for the sale." Dilbert says, "Your planning has improved." The man closes his optics and says, "Showtime blame transfer now . . ." The other people at the table growl.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #be specific, #bounus, #congratulations, #wait bonus, #adept work, #act randomly

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The Boss says, "Alice, here's a bonus for your practiced work." Alice asks, "On what?" The Boss says, "I can't exist specific, because then yous might practise it over again and expect another bonus." Alice says, "Congratulations; y'all've motivated me to act randomly." The Boss points and says, "I'm going over here and I don't know why."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #alice, #bonus, #capitalism, #flawed premise, #less piece of work, #wally bonus, #worked less, #implications staggering, #frightening bonus

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Alice, Wally and Dilbert sit at a table. Alice says, "I did less work than usual this quarter and I got a bonus." Alice says, "The implications are staggering. The entire organisation of capitalism has a flawed premise." Alice says, "There's only 1 thing that could brand this bonus more frightening." Wally says, "I got i, too."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #interfered with projection, #empowering employees, #bonus, #real boss, #torso in dumpster, #dominate acting unusual

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Dilbert and The Dominate. Dilbert says, "You haven't interfered with my project in weeks. Something must be wrong." The Boss responds, "I believe in empowering my employees and staying out of the way." Dilbert, in a surprised style, says, "Am I going to find my existent boss'due south torso in a dumpster?" The Boss says, "There'south actress coin in the budget. Would you like a bonus?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #excellent performance, #no bonus, #lost fortune, #elbonian collpase, #fault for working here

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The boss and Dlbert sit at the Boss' desk, The Boss says, "Your performance was excellent, simply in that location'south no bonus this year." Dilbert says,"Why non?" The Boss says, "The company lost a fortune in the Elbonian currency plummet." The Dominate says, "But in a way, information technology'southward your own fault for working here." Dilbert says,"Thanks. That takes the sting out."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dogbert teaches math, #cut staff, #bonus worth, #expense requiremnets, #calculated, #upkeep, #multiply by i, #doctor, #flashlight, #projections come from, #medical

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The explanation says, "Dogbert teaches business math." Dogbert points to a diagram of an equation. A picture of Wally, Dilbert and Alice illustrates the equation, "Grunts equals cypher." The caption says, "#1. Any chore that tin exist done past two people . . ." The Boss stands behind two people. The caption continues, ". . . Can be done by one person for half the cost." The Dominate yanks one of the workers out of his chair. The caption says, "#two. A bonus today is worth more than than . . ." The Dominate holds a big purse of money. The caption continues, ". . . The whole company tomorrow." An office edifice has a closed sign on it. The caption says, "#3. Your expense requirements for Dec can exist calculated . . ." The Dominate sits at his desk writing on a piece of paper. The caption continues, ". . . By taking what'southward left in the upkeep and multiplying by one." A commitment person asks the Boss, "Giraffe goes where?" Dogbert says, "Side by side calendar week, a doctor with a flashlight shows usa where sales projections come from."

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Source: https://dilbert.com/search_results?terms=bonus

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